Join a Perpetrator Programme
Perpetrator programmes are designed to help men to change their abusive behaviours and develop respectful, non-abusive relationships. As most of the domestic violence perpetrators are male, most perpetrator programmes work with men.
They are usually small groups of 8-12 men who have been violent or abusive in a current or previous relationship. They generally include a wide range of men from different social and cultural backgrounds.
What do perpetrator programmes involve?
The groups are usually run by two or three experienced group-workers-at least one man and at least one woman. There are many different programmes across the UK, and the content will vary, but on the whole they will cover these issues:
· What is violence and abuse?
· Understanding why I’m violent
· Learning that I am in control of my own behaviour and can choose not to be violent.
· Taking responsibility for my behaviour, without blaming others or minimising it.
· Understanding the impact of violence and abuse on my partner and children.
· Learning how to notice when I am becoming abusive and how to stop.
· Learning different, non-abusive ways of dealing with difficulties in my relationship.
· Dealing non-abusively with my partner’s anger.
· Recognising how I get wound up and learning how to wind myself down.
· Negotiation and listening- how to build a respectful relationship.
· Some groups are discussion based, but most use a variety of interactive exercises to make the learning realistic, stimulating and relevant to men’s own situations.
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How long do they last for?
Programmes will differ in length and content, but Respect’s guidelines recommend:
‘Changing behaviour is a long-term process-especially for someone who has used violence and abuse for a long time. Programmes should be at least 75 hours, usually this will mean that each client attends at least 24 weekly sessions of 2-3 hours.’
How can you join?
Some programmes take men who self-refer, some take men who are mandated to attend by the courts as part of a probation order, or as a recommendation from the family courts. Respect will be able to tell you which programmes take self-referrals-Ring the Respect Phoneline to find out more.
Men who refer themselves will generally meet with a worker for an assessment interview. This is to enable both the worker and the client to check that the programme is suitable. Once a man is accepted onto a programme he will usually join a group at the next intake session.
If you want to find out if there's a programme near you, phone the Respect Phoneline on 0845 122 8609.
Choose to stop!
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